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The Old Jewish Men's Guide to Eating, Sleeping, and Futzing Around

Here is a humorous, surprisingly stylish, and crotchety celebration of a most fascinating group of fellas: Old Jewish Men. In this essential guide, readers learn how to eat, dress, get around town, and schmooze like a seasoned OJM. Ever wonder why Old Jewish Men eat so much cottage cheese and melon? If Larry David and Bernie Sanders have the same barber? Who is the next great up-and-coming OJM? (NOTE: You don’t need to be old, Jewish, or a man—it’s a lifestyle.) Plus, there’s helpful jargon, detailed deli and coffee shop rundowns, and the ten OJM archetypes, from New York Schlubs to Tough Guys to Grumpy Intellectuals. A perfect gift for any Jewish dad / granddad / uncle / brother or anybody who likes a healthy shmear of classic Jewish humor, the book is full of hilarious full-color illustrations and chapters including: How to Exist in This Fakakta World; The Art of the Schmooze; How to Live Forever; and King of the Temple.

Editorial Reviews

Hilarious and insightful. Noah Rinsky, old beyond his years and funny as hell, nails the essence of what it means to be an Old Jewish Man—from the joys of the deli counter to the art of the art of the schmooze and the pleasures of the snooze.” —Bob Mankoff, former cartoon editor, The New Yorker

“I love men, I love old men, and I especially love Old Jewish Men and what we can learn from them! Thanks to this delightful book, I will never again accept a barista's claim that a bathroom is ‘for employees only’!” —
Naomi Fry, staff writer, The New Yorker

“New York would be nothing without its Old Jewish Men—this is quintessential reading.” —
New York Nico

“The Old Jewish Men’s Guide is the bible of alte kakerism. Use it in good health.” —Roz Chast, cartoonist, The New Yorker
“As an Old Jewish Man in training, I consider this book the modern Mishnah for any mensch.” —
Jake Cohen, New York Times bestselling cookbook author/Nice Jewish Boy

“When they told me how much they were charging for this fakakta thing I took it personally. They could have charged a lot more and given me a cut!” —Robby Hoffman, Emmy award–winning comedy writer
“I am blessed to have this funny, practical manual to chaperone my journey from manhood to Old Jewish Man–hood. Baruch Hashem.” —Gary Gulman, comedian and author

“A holistic guide on how to kvetch and cough your way into one’s wonder years. In these pages you’ll learn how to properly donate a museum wing, tell a joke as dated as a 70-year-old gefilte fish, and retire comfortably to, of course, Boca. Just always bring a sweater.” —Jacob Gallagher, fashion columnist, The Wall Street Journal

“I gave this kid his start, I blurbed his book, and now I get free OJM clothes for life. 10/10”
Mel Ottenberg, editor in chief, Interview magazine
“This book has done more for Jewish men than Moses. I now want to skip middle age and go right to my Old Jewish Man era.” —Josh Peck, future OJM

“As an Old Jewish Man, I appreciated the comprehensiveness of this book—it’s jam-packed with advice, both funny and smart. I hope and pray that all Old Jewish Men continue to thrive until they are 120.” —Moshe Waldoks, co-editor of The Big Book of Jewish Humor

“Masterful. This generation’s Dead Sea Scroll.”
Liana Satenstein, wife of the author (and Vogue contributor)

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